Meeting Caleb Where He Is

There was a time I was teaching Caleb how to cycle. We were out in an open space with a 200-meter loop, and I thought it would be the perfect training ground. In my mind, the goal was simple: get him to ride the full loop so that he could build up balance and confidence.

But it didn’t take long before I realised this was not going to work. Caleb clearly wasn’t enjoying himself. He kept bargaining to cycle shorter distances, asking each time, “After one round, can we stop?” To me, one loop was the bare minimum. But for him, it felt like an impossible mountain.

Then came a turning point. When he asked if he could just ride to a spot 15 meters away, I decided to agree. To my surprise, he was suddenly motivated to pedal. That small distance felt achievable. From there, we turned it into a game—Emma would do the full loop while Caleb took on his shorter stretch. Over time, he managed to complete more rounds, and in the process, he learned how to start and stop pedaling on his own. That was exactly what I had set out to achieve.

Lessons Along the Way

1. Meet them where they are.

What seems like a reasonable goal to me might be overwhelming to a child. Sometimes, the first step forward is simply lowering the bar to a place they can see and reach.

2. Small goals matter.

Even though the bigger picture remains—learning to cycle for family rides together—it was the small, incremental steps that brought Caleb along. Without them, he might have given up altogether.

3. Patience is key.

I found myself comparing Caleb with Emma, who had been more diligent in her learning. That comparison only revealed my own impatience. Every child’s pace is different, and my role is not to rush but to guide.

This experience reminded me that when we set goals that are too far beyond readiness, we can turn joy into drudgery. But when we walk alongside and break things into smaller pieces, progress happens naturally.

The Gospel Connection

And here’s where the reflection deepened for me: how does this mirror God’s way with us?

The ultimate goal for the Christian is clear—Christlikeness. But if God simply placed that standard before us and left us to our own devices, we would crumble under the weight. Instead, He works patiently in us, leading step by step. Salvation may come in a single moment when our eyes are opened, but growth is gradual, shaped by countless small victories of grace along the way.

Which leads me to ask: How should the Christian think about this?

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A Deeper Reflection

First, God is patient. Just as I had to stand beside Caleb, encouraging him as he wobbled forward, God’s patience surpasses mine infinitely. He does not compare us with others or rush us at a pace beyond what we can bear.

Second, God is not only beside us—He is within us. While I could cheer Caleb on and give him external motivation, I could not give him the actual balance or strength to pedal. But God, by His Spirit, works within us to will and to act according to His purpose. That is a far greater assurance than any earthly parent can provide.

Finally, the principle of small steps remains. Though the destination is fixed—conformity to Christ—we reach it through daily growth. Sometimes it feels like only 15 meters at a time, sometimes a full loop. Yet every bit counts, because the One who began a good work in us will bring it to completion.

And so, teaching Caleb to cycle became more than a parenting exercise. It was a living picture of how the Father teaches us—patiently, purposefully, and faithfully leading us toward the joy of maturity in Christ.